The Obligatory "Writer's Block" Post.

I know! I know! I've been gone almost two weeks without a word. I think that's actually a new record for me. I blame it on that damn blinking cursor that greets me when I open up my 'Compose' screen. Pretentious little sonofabitch, huh? I just got tired of staring at that thing. I mean it just sits there, mocking me... blinking. Daring me and jeering me. It says, "Go ahead! Write something. Bet you can't. Bet you just sit there and do nothing."

I hate that cursor.

As you're well aware, it's an unofficial rule when you have a blog is that you should write on said blog from time to time. It's kind of expected, to be honest. Darn rules! I wish I could say it's because I've been sooo damn busy that I've barely had time to breath, let along write, but the truth of the matter is I've hardly been doing much of anything.

Besides staring at a blinking cursor, that is.

Actually, that's kind of the problem. It's hard to relay my new adventures when I haven't been having any. Sitting at home all day doesn't exactly provide much in the way of blog fodder.

I know what you're going to say, "But, Vinny, what about Sprocket Ink? You've still been writing over at Sprocket Ink."

Yes, I have. So, technically, I guess I don't really have writer's block... Wait! You guys have been checking out my posts over at Sprocket, have you?

Well?

I... I don't believe this. How..? Why..? Don't make me use my signature "Scowl of Disapproval".

GRRR!

There's still chance to redeem yourselves. I put in an extra post today (Sorry. Site's gone now). It's up right now and don't forget tomorrow's post too. Don't make me give you the other half of that scowl.

Anyway, I figure if I could waste your time with the last few paragraphs just writing about my inability to write then I'm full of it I can snap out of it. Expect me back... soon.

Vinny Unplugged.

For those of you who have been wondering why things have been so quite around here the past few days, I've was forcibly removed from the Matrix again. That's right! Our internet was down... AGAIN! This time, it was completely gone for FIVE WHOLE DAYS!!! Don't ask me how I survived. I don't know either. At first, I did take it the same way I always do...

Eventually, though, I snapped out of it. I decided to busy myself with other things. I'm a trooper like that.

Hey! Did you guys know there are other uses for a computer besides surfing the web? I know it sounds crazy, but stay with me on this. Among other things, I actually played games and music on it. It's like a giant cellphone!

I even went outside a few times. And not because I had to. It was just for the heck of it. I know! Crazy, right? I like to take chances every now and then. By the way, has anyone else noticed there's this giant ball of fire in the sky?

Between you and me, I don't think it comes in peace.

But my internet returned and I'm back! And I'm making up for lost time with a brand spankin' new post over at Sprocket Ink. Today, we're talking about one of my favorite topics: Coffee!

Awesome mug courtesy of Nubian. Being put to good use, as you can see.

The results on a new study on how the magic bean can help protect us from the fiery overlord looming overhead have been released and I couldn't wait to share the good news. So, as always, just click here and enjoy. In fact, go make a cup of coffee to sip while you read. You'll thank me later.

Taking The Show On The Road.

source

Doing what you do without fear of the unknown is nice. You know the rules, the people, how all the furniture is arranged and so on. It's nice to be comfortable. But, every now and again, we all like to go outside of the confines of our safe surroundings and explore new places, see new sights, meet new people and see what trouble we can get into in a different venue than what we're accustomed to.

This is true even for introverts like myself. Only what I consider to be "adventure" isn't as awkward, or potentially dangerous as actually physically going out into the real world. That? That's just crazy! Instead, I prefer to explore the different landscapes made available to me on the old interwebz here.

And that's what I'm doing today. I'll be spending the day (virtually) over at fellow Sprocket, Sarah's blog, La Casa Di Frigerio. There I'm talking about one of my favorite summertime "spectator sports". Well... to be honest, it isn't actually a sport per se, but it's entertaining nonetheless.

So check it out.

Yes! *Another* Post That Isn't Really A Post.

I'm working on some posts and one of them has some drawing involved so I'm a tad busy right now. But that doesn't mean I'll leave you hangin'.

It just so happens I have a brand new post up at Sprocket Ink today. That should tide you over. If you're good and go over there right now, I promise I'll do a real post here for you soon.

CLICK HERE.

Don't Mess With Our Cows!

I'm over at Sprocket Ink again today and this time I've moved on from penguins to cows. Before you ask, no, they're not involved in some sort of twisted tipping fetish. They're actually under attack.

But don't worry. Cows are tough. They're on the ropes now but when they fight back- and they will - look out! Plus, as propaganda for their cause, I employ the use of the Evil Cow Meme.

Dare you to go check it out and see how. CLICK HERE.

So... This Is What Vegan Porn Looks Like?

For those of you who know me, you've probably noticed that I have no issue in addressing certain topics. Like  pornography, for instance. But today, on Sprocket Ink, things get a little confused as I talk about pseudo-porn (porn that's not actually porn) on a pseudo-porn site (a porn site that's not act... You get the idea!).

I won't say too much on the subject here. Your mission, should you choose to accept it (and, let's face it, you will choose to) is to follow the LINK. As always, should you be caught or killed, then you probably went off on your own and did something you shouldn't have and will most likely be wishing that you had stopped to read my post instead. Remember, you were warned.

Nobody Cares!

Okay! Maaaybe I get a little rant-y today. But of course there's also that way funnier post I did over on Sprocket Ink today. Just click here. Otherwise, feel free to continue.

After you visit Sprocket that is...

In life we all go through some crap. Sometimes it can be petty annoying crap that messes up your day, sometimes that crap can be so craptastic it can even be life altering. I've been through both and if there's one thing I've learned from my experiences is this:

Nobody cares.

This took me a while to accept, but the pure and simple fact of it is, no matter how broken up you might be about your troubles, no matter how big a pity party you throw, at the end of the day, people have their own lives and their own crap to deal with. They don't have time to shoulder your burdens too.

Maybe you work for one of those "caring companies". Good for you! But you should know they don't actually "care" about their employees. I'll let you in a secret. It's still all about them. See, they figured that staff are more productive and are less likely to quit (or go on a homicidal rampage) if they feel their bosses "care" about them. Sorry to break it to you like this.

Or am I?

So let's say you had a bad relationship, or worked in a place that totally screwed you over. Do you think the next person or employer that comes along is looking for damaged goods? Maybe that new person or boss sees your potential and decides to give you a chance. Maybe they like fixing broken things and you're their next project. Those will be among the rare exceptions and will only be good up to a point. Eventually, they will expect to see some return on their efforts and you'll be expected to pick yourself up and dust yourself off. If not, they dump you too (WOOHOO! More to sulk about).

Nope. They don't care. They don't give a shit. They don't want deal with your issues. That's the hard truth, buddy.

Now, don't get me wrong, there are those who will care for a while. Close family, even friends will often lend a sympathetic ear or a shoulder to cry on. But they're only willing to put up with it for a while, and trust me, they get really tired of someone who keeps living in the past.

So all that being said, maybe you should think about actually getting over whatever it is that knocked you down and get on with your life. Maybe it's you who needs to stop caring. Just let go whatever "it" was that got you down. Learn whatever you can from it and move forward.

Or not. Whatever! I don't care.

I've Been Holding Out.

I don't exactly know how to say this, but recently, I've gotten myself involved in something. It's complicated and even I don't know how things turned out this way, but I think it's time I 'fessed up about it. You see, for over a month now, I've been spending most of my mornings here:

That's right. It is a gym. And, no, this isn't a new job (I wish). Also, I haven't just been hanging around watching other people work out. I can't believe I'm saying this but... I have been working out. And I've actually been participating in this REGULARLY!

I know! I know! How could I? I'm not too proud of it either. The gym just sits right there on the corner and I have to pass it every time I go out. It mocks you, you know. Promising you an attractive body and the chance of one day being able to take off your shirt at the beach without fear or shame. Who can resist that?

Then there's society and the media. They're as much to blame. They've been poisoning our minds from the very start. All those "biceps" and "abs" all over the place on TV and in magazines. Name one fat superhero. You can't, can you? It's because they brainwashing us! Then there's all the peer pressure! I don't know how yet but there had to be some involved.

Now I have to deal with muscle aches. I didn't even know I had muscles before the pain showed me where to find them all. Oh, and did I mention I have to change my eating too. I have to eat fruit and raisin bran now. Did you know there are no marshmallows in bran flakes? MADNESS!!!

Added to all this is how Mrs. C has been reacting to my new pastime. She knows what I've been doing and she's been noticing the subtle changes I've been going through since I started. Now she's starting to give me this strange look. A very disturbing look. The hungry cat kind of look.

This may not end well.

As I sit here and ponder my shame, remember to go over to Sprocket Ink and check out what I did there today too. Fair warning: You may not want to be eating while you read it... Click here when you're ready.

A Group of Men Discover In Terror That Breasts Do Not Just Go Away On Their Own.

If there's one thing people know by now is that I'm fascinated by boobs. Okay, technically those are two things since they usually come in pairs, but let's not get distracted here...

...

...

...

Sorry kinda trailed off there for a minute. Now where was I? Right! Boobs, mammaries, ta-tas, breasts.

Bet you wish you had your own lovely assistant.

Yeah, those.

Whatever you call 'em, one thing's for sure, it isn't just me, we all love 'em.  C'mon! Admit it! You know you do. Well... most of us anyway.

This brings me to the reason for this post (why, no, it wasn't just to talk about boobs... oddly enough). It seems there is actually a group of people out there who find large boobs too distracting. Men, no less. And, as such, they decided to fire the carrier of said large boobs for the offence of bringing them to work every day. I won't say more here but this is the story I look into on my newest post on Sprocket Ink.

Click here to learn more.

Amazing!

Bringing Back The Classics.

As of last Saturday I am officially free of end of term exams and, all things considered, I think I did pretty okay *fingers crossed*.

With that out of the way I think it's about I dust off this old blog and get to some serious posting. Don't you think? Yeah. I knew you'd agree. That being said, I'm working on something special for tomorrow. Veeeery special! I won't give too much away but I'll say this much - the old gang (meaning: Lacy, Diane, Robert and Steven) are finally coming off of their extended vacation for this one.

I know! You can hardly wait, right?

Anyway, I left a little something over at Sprocket Ink to tide you over till then. It's about the newest robotic innovation from the land of Japan. Trust me. This one's a whole lot weirder than last week's story about the emotionally sensitive vacuum cleaner.

So click the SI badge over there on the right and go check things out over there while I put the finishing touches on tomorrow's post.

Trying To Keep My Head Above Water.

In case you're noticing my absence of late, I'm still off navigating the churning sea I like to call end of semester exams. It was a tough semester. It felt like I was barely able to stay afloat this time. The good news is I'll be free and clear of them by the end of the week. YAY!

Of course, you know I couldn't leave you hanging. That's why I left you a little something over at Sprocket Ink to tide you over until I get back. You know the drill by now, right? Just click on the official Sprocket Ink badge over to the right and prepare sail away to a happier place. Enjoy!

As for me, it's back to the books before I get totally submerged. That, and I'm out of ocean metaphors.

Because Everyone's Doing A Willy Wonka Meme...

This will only make sense once you read my post at Sprocket Ink today.

Click here.

Oh! Also in the news:

Click to enlarge...

New Post Up At Sprocket.

Just click here.

The Five Scariest Words.

Bonus day!!! I'm here and on Sprocket Ink with two full posts. You are quite welcome. So click the link, go, read, enjoy and then come back here for desert. It'll still be fresh when you get back.

********

It was a Monday morning like any other Monday morning. I was at my former workplace, The Paper. As I always do, I went to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee. As I neared my destination, I should have sensed there was something wrong. Had it been any other day, my senses would have been sharper. Perhaps, had I already had that cup of coffee, I might have noticed that nature was slightly off-balance. But I didn't. Not until it was almost too late.

I walked through the kitchen door and immediately it hit me. There was indeed a disturbance in the force. There, in front of me, stood Joy and Fitz (not their real names, obviously). They were locked on a stare reminiscent to when a gazelle looks into a lion's eyes and knows he's just breathed his last.

I didn't know what was going on, but every instinct I had screamed at me to get out of that room. Which, of course, I did.

The tension in the air was thick. Soon, Fitz tried (unsuccessfully) to speak.

Fitz: That's not what I meant! I mean- Um... All I was saying was- I didn't mean that you were... Please don't kill me.


This was bad. Whatever he had said, Fitz had crossed a line. A line no man should cross, and now his end was near. Poor Fitz. I almost never spoke to him, but he seemed nice enough. If only I had the time, maybe we could have even been friends. But it was too late now. I decided it was best I get to a safe distance before Joy decided to make me seconds.

After the funeral Later, I found out what had happened. Joy and Fitz had run into each other in the kitchen and were chatting. That's when Fitz said the words that would seal his fate.

Fitz: You must have had a fun weekend. You look fatigued.

I. know. He actually did say that.

Then Joy - the woman who always smiled, the woman who prefers to hug you instead of telling you 'Good morning', the woman who pouted for three whole days because management refused to let her put up decorations in the office at Christmas... Yes, that Joy - stopped. The smile which seemed to be etched on to her face was still there, but somehow it seemed twisted... EVIL. Her eyes froze in a deathly stare and she said the five words that will reduce even the surliest brute to a blubbering puddle of fear.

Joy: What's that supposed to mean?

Even I was rendered speechless just imagining the conversation. Fitz did manage to survive, but he was a shell of his former self. He spent the rest of the day lumbering around the halls, refusing to make eye contact with anyone. Though it takes only a few hours for the spine to return to it's solid state, it would be several days before he could face Joy again.

We can only hope he learned a valuable lesson from his encounter and never makes that mistake in the future.

In Case You Hadn't Noticed...

I'm AWOL again. Landlady forgot to pay the nice internet people again so, like Neo popping that red pill, I've been once again forcibly ejected from my warm and cozy metallic pod, confused, scared and, yes, naked.

Don't ask.

I'm still working on getting my own internet but that's taking longer than planned.

But while that may limit my presence here in the ol' interwebz, it's not enough to stop me. Being exhausted from the crazy hours at work and the assignments heaped onto by my lecturers at school, that might be enough.

Nah! Not even all that.

So I'm here. In whatever limited capacity I can show up in. But I do come bearing a gift: a brand spanking new post over at Sprocket Ink! Thought it wasn't going to happen, did you? I know this isn't one of my usual days but I thought I'd mix it up a little. Keep you on your toes.

As always should you choose to accept this post (honestly, there's no reason not to) just click the link or the SI badge to the right and you're all set.

The Return Of Anime Catgirl.

I'm not really here today. I'm over at Sprocket Ink where I made another drawing of my anime catgirl. Just one, but she's there.

Plus, there's a story there that I wrote too, fyi. It's sort of a disturbing one, but I won't give anything away here.

You know the drill. Follow the link and get your read on.

Multiple Sightings.

We have received numerous reports of multiple sightings of the blogger known as Vinny C.

Eyewitnesses have claimed that he has been simultaneously sighted on his blog as well as on Sprocket Ink and Studio 30 Plus.

While some call it an invasion, AVCI contacted various experts of the interwebz to provide a possible explanation to this phenomenon.

"We think he may have mutated due to over exposure to a highly concentrated combination of caffeine, internet and free time," one scientist said.

Authorities are urging the public to not panic, stating that following the the various links to where he was sighted seems to keep the spread at bay.

"Now-now! There's no need to get all worked up here people. Our advisers guarantee that Vinny's intentions are friendly and he means us no harm." a senior political figure stated as he (and several prostitutes) were being quickly escorted into his bunker.

AVCI will be monitoring the phenomenon and will update you on any further developments.

SnapIt - The Time I Tried To Review A Product.

The other day I got an email from someone asking me to review their software. Now, while I don't normally do that kind of stuff, I decided, "What the hell?" and said yes. Plus, I thought maybe it would lead to other offers which would lead to tons of money and me realizing my dream of quitting my job and being able to live off money I make from the internet.

Sounds realistic, right?

Anyway, I'm sure some of you may have heard about SnapIt Screen Capture software.

It's an easy-to-use screen capture software that not only allows you to capture any image from your computer screen, but let's you drag and select the part of the image you want.

As the website describes this Screen Capture Software:

Capture anything you see on your PC screen with SnapIt. It is convenient tool for graphic designers, bloggers who capture and crop images for their posts, for tech writers who need to describe menus and interfaces of applications, web designers and those who work with graphics every day. It captures and auto saves images with one click.

- Supports hotkeys, auto-saving, clipboard

- Automatically copies screenshots to the clipboard

- Tracks capture history, auto-saves captured images

- Saves files in BMP, GIF, JPEG, PNG and TIFF formats

-Auto-names captured images

So I gave the free trial version a spin and they're right about it being a very easy-to-use software. You just preset where you want your image saved, what format you want it saved in and you're set. When you want to capture an image all you have to do is hit 'PrintScreen' (that is set by default but you can change it if you like).

So let's say we use this pic from a recent Sprocket Ink post I did:

Once you have the pic up on your screen, just hit 'PrintScreen' and drag and select any area of the screen you want. Like so:

or so:

or so:

or so:

You get the idea.

That's all there is to it! It's process light, so it wont slow your computer down and under US$20. (US$17.99 to be exact). Not bad if you have images to crop and don't want to go get a degree in computing to use some complicated program.

A Bird In The Hand...

Yesterday, while I was getting ready for work I heard a strange noise coming from the kitchen. That's when I found this:

You may have me now, but the joke's on you when you see what I left in your hand.

A Ground Dove. I don't know that much about birds but I could tell it's young. It came in through an open window and was freaking out a little because it felt trapped. It fluttered around until it ended up stuck in a waste basket.

Coincidentally, My post on Sprocket Ink today is about a trapped bird. Only, this is about one that got away. Click on the SI badge to the right to see what I'm talking about.

Celebrating Another Milestone... With Grape Soda & Adult Cartoons.

My limited presence of late is due to internet acting up again. To be honest, we getting pretty tired of it here. While we do appreciate the free access that comes with this apartment, we plan to take out our own, more reliable service from next month and put an end to all this drama.

Of course, that doesn't stop me from getting my regular post up at Sprocket Ink, and today I officially cross 100 posts there. Woohoo!!!

When I first announced I'd be shifting my focus there to stories that were more Japan in nature, I got one or two requests to investigate the Japanese phenomenon called "Tentacle Porn". Well, for my 101st Sprocket post, I look at a Japanese product that takes this weird fetish to the mainstream masses.

By the way, don't let the subject matter worry you. It's totally safe for work so feel free to click on the old SI badge to your right.