Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The Scariest Headlines I've Ever Read.

I know I said I wouldn't do a pseudo-post again but I have to let you all know that Sprocket Ink's back from vacation and we're hitting the ground running. I've got a brand spanking new post up there so just click in my SI badge to the right (which I somehow doubt you'll be able to miss). Two words: Japanese. toilets.


Actually, I wouldn't really call this one a pseudo-post since I'm still writing beyond that last paragraph. I submit then that this does not, in fact count as a pseudo-post and I have, in fact, kept my word.

Uh-uh-uh! No arguing. I already said it.

Anyway, as you've may have guessed, I read the news sometimes. But recently I've come across some very disturbing real story headlines that made me cringe before I even read the the actual stories.

I'll list some of them for you. Keep in mind these are the actual headlines from actual news sites:

Man Dies After Eating Cocaine Hidden In Brother's Butt
- Hiroyuki Joho, Man Killed By Train, Sued After His Flying Body Parts Injured Woman
Sex Assault on Chihuahua Gets Ex-Convict 10 Years

And my personal-um-favorite(?)

- Patient Allegedly Had Penis Eaten Off By Rats


*crosses legs and puts hands in lap nervously*

Okay, so now that I've thoroughly traumatized most, if not all of you. Head on over to Sprocket and read about weird toilet obsessions.


  1. Human beings: endlessly fascinating.


  2. I will never think about rats the same way again... yikes.

  3. I was terrified of rats prior to this... How can someone be sued for getting killed? Even still, isn't it the train's fault?

  4. Nope. No cocaine butt. Just no. Wow.

  5. I hope those were at least girl rats.
    If not, then that'd be just plain weird.

  6. Sounds like the ex-con didn't learn his lesson about dog-fucking while behind bars.

  7. So that's how 1984 could have ended.

  8. @ Kage: Sometimes, though, crazy seems to be a worldwide affliction.

    @ Pearl: Yeah. Don't stories like these make you want to lock a few up? For study, I mean.

    @ Mike: I wasn't a fan of them before. Now... "yikes" is right.

    @ Q: The real story is if the dead guy actually loses & has to pay... & does.

    @ Nicole: Agreed. There are no circumstances that can justify anything like that. NONE!

    @ Al: I know! Right? Having your wang chewed by a boy rat... awk-ward.

    @ Thorn: Let's hope the lesson is thoroughly-um-pounded into him during his next stint. And, of course, thanks for the follow.

    @ dbs: Maybe his hospital room was number 101.

  9. So I SHOULDN'T eat cocaine from a butt? Snorting it is still cool, right?

  10. Chihuahuas are TINY. Is it weird that THAT is my immediate reaction to those titles?

  11. @ Pickleope: I can't confirm or deny that statement. Except for the first part. Definitely avoid.

    @ Gia: Yes. But that's exactly why I love my fellow bloggers so.

  12. I really want to read those entire articles now.

  13. @ Brett: You'll be doing so at your own risk.

  14. Also @ Brett: P.S. Thanks for following.


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