Tuesday, November 30, 2010

It's Tuesday - So Even More Randomness

I've been kinda AWOL from blogging for a few days. Mostly because my lecturers seem to be on a drive to make my brain explode. Another contributor is the fact that HOLYFREAKINCRAP, it's been a boring week! I've literally felt the boredom drain the life out of me these last few days. The highpoint of the last few days was going into the city with Mrs. C on Saturday just to do some errands. Even then, while we were in the cosmetics store, I was trying to figure out how much force I would need to employ in order to impale myself through the eye with a make-up pencil. But I got a barbecue pork sub out of the deal and I still have both eyes so it's all good. But, it's Tuesday and you know what that means. It's time to get random.

Of course, shout out to Keely, the Un Mom for making Random Tuesday Thoughts possible.

- The office was smelling like ass today. Then the cleaning lady came and now it smells like a floral bouquet... and ass.

- With enough practice, you can fool people into thinking you actually listening when they're telling you stuff you didn't ask and don't really care about.

- Had no coffee today. Someone started a conversation by asking me, "You know what I'm thinking?" and I came this close to replying, "Not really. So, either I'm not really a psychic or you're lying about thinking."... This is further proof that it really is in everyone's best interest I maintain some level of caffeine intake.

- If I could harness the power of static electricity then, instead of always getting zapped by doorknobs I could use my powers to help those in need. Or zap 'em. That would be more fun. On a side note, people who enjoy it every time I jerk my hand away from the knob and yell "Son of a bitch!", are getting zapped first.

- I had a dream the other night that the world was being invaded by alien plant people. I believe the steamed vegetables I had for lunch the day before may have had a part to play in this.

Ahhh... I feel much better now.


  1. You'll have to zap me first. I chuckled just reading it.

  2. Y'know, one of my classrooms smells like ass. But that may just be because it's filled with shitheads.

    I kid!

  3. I think I would like that power to zap people. Probably too much...

  4. What was up with the whole no coffee fiasco? By choice or there wasn't any available? Do not attempt again, okay.

  5. @ paulsifer42: If that's the case, I'll do you a favor & make it quick & painless... Okay, well, quick anyway.

    @ Didactic Pirate: Kidding, huh? Well if that's the way you're gonna spin it, who am I to judge. Just so you know, I agree with you that they're probably shitheads.

    @ Rabbit: I know what you mean. There's no possible way to get tired of an ability like that. And some people make it so easy to want to use it.

    @ Nubian: Can you believe they ran out & didn't see the need to replace it right away? There's got to be some kind of union or something I can take this up with.

  6. Isn't it odd how fearful we all are of static electricity? No one has ever died from it have they?

  7. If you have a boring week you should make stuff up, I mean does anybody ever tell the whole truth on their blog? I mean I do, but I'm millionairess wonderwoman and I live in comedy Utopia, so I don't count.

  8. You know how everytime you get out of the car you get a major über zap? Email me if you want the ultimate solution that will stop and end all car door zapping forever. I feel powerful NOW!

  9. "So, either I'm not really a psychic or you're lying about thinking." for the record, i feel like this with and without caffeine. too funny.

  10. Oh. You mean you're NOT supposed to give that reply? Hm. I think someone's been switching out the office coffee with decaf, then.

    Or I'm just a bitch. Either way.

  11. @ dbs: I think it's because it always hits when your guard is down. As for static electricity related deaths, I wouldn't put it past the wool-sock & carpet industries to jointly cover those stories up...

    Freak lightning bolt through the window, my ass.

    @ Sarah Walton: Unfortunately, I'm not a very creative person. My attempts at creativity usually end badly... normally with someone losing an eye or partial hearing in one ear.

    @ Miss Nikki: Major Über Zap?... *blink*... I like it!!! I hadn't even considered what name I would use once I hone my abilities.

    @ pattypunker: No mistake. So do I. It's just that the caffeine keeps me out of those annoying disciplinary meetings.

    @ Keely: At the very least I know that I can't give that reply - according to my last quarterly revue, anyway.

  12. Greetings Vinny.
    How to avoid harming yourself at the cosmetics counter. Turn teen. Pay attention to what sales lady is asking. (Looking for mascara.)
    "Do you want long or thick?"
    She should have finished.the.sentence. She got communal tears and "waterproof?"

  13. There's a ham in that graphic. If that isn't random, I don't know what is. Look a pony!

  14. @dbs and Vinny
    I wouldn't be surprised if there was some fuel source, like let's say... gasoline, covering someone and static electricity being the ignitor. Just sayin...

  15. @ Artist and Geek: That sounds way too complicated for me. That's why I normally just fake a stomach ache if Mrs. C asks me to pick up make-up for her.

    @ Elly Lou: Where?! Dang, missed it! I didn't even notice the ham. That makes things even better.

    @ paulsifer42: Methinks static shock is the least of your problems if you're in a situation that results in you being covered in gasoline.


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