Well I hope everyone had a great Christmas weekend. Mine was... eventful. As usual, it was filled with family, nog, turkey and ham.
Hey, you know what I think about when I think about ham?
Big shout out to Keely, the Un Mom for making Random Tuesday Thoughts possible.
We're sitting at home on the couch. After a weekend of holiday family visits, we're tired and are warming ourselves in front of the glow of our TV.
My wife looks at me, " What was that?!"
"Earthquake." I reply. The fact that she acknowledged it confirmed that it was real.
Mrs. C springs to her feet, eyes wide. She looks around the room. Quickly, she heads inside to check on The Old Woman (her grandmother, who has been living with us for the past few months). She noticed it too.
We brace ourselves... and wait...
All this time, I'd been playing it cool. Mrs. C tends to be the expressive one. If she's scared, worried, happy, sad, you'll notice. Me... I put up a nonchalant front most of the time. In this instance, I decided to be the calm one again, as usual. However, this was only a front. An outside appearance I put up to avoid feeding into my wife's panic. Inside was much different.
"What should we do? Stand under a doorway? Get under a desk? SHIT! We don't have a desk! How could we not have a desk?! We can't survive nature's onslaught without a desk!!! Maybe we'd be safer outside. No! That's not right. Why didn't I pay more attention?!"
"Maybe it wasn't an earthquake. Maybe it was the aftershock of some kind of explosion. Nah! We would've heard something. An explosion big enough to rock our apartment twice would have clearly made some kind of sound. A loud one."
"OH.CRAP! Alien attack!"
I try to remain calm as I move to the window. Nothing. No strange, bright lights, no ominous dark silhouettes hovering in the night sky. Still, I don't trust it.
"Okay, think! What do you when the aliens attack? SHIT! I can't remember. What have I been doing all this time?! I've been watching sci-fi movies for as long as I can remember. I should know this. What am I saying? This is why I shouldn't have watched Skyline (not that it had anything to do with the situation. It was just 90 minutes of my life I wasted on that crap and I'll never get them back. And now that the aliens are attacking! I could have been preparing instead!)"