Friday, October 28, 2011

It All Started With A Simple Request.

Mrs. C: Vinny, could you help me with something tomorrow? I have some letters to post out. I already typed them up but, since our printer is out of ink, you'll have to get them printed somewhere. 

I look at the forms.

Me: It says here that you have to submit some copies of other stuff with them.
Mrs. C: I have those... But only the originals. You can get the copies made in the same place you're doing the printing.
Me: And buy envelopes too.
Mrs. C: Yup. CRAP!
Me: What?
Mrs. C: The deadline on one of them is in two days. I don't want to take the chance to post it and it ends up arriving too late. You'll have to drop it directly at their office for me.

This is the point where I usually whine, cuss and complain voice my objection about her always waiting until the last minute to try and get her thousand and one errands done. However, given her current-um-"disposition", I choose to keep my opinions subdued. I make a mental note to discuss it with her at a different time of the month... when she's less stabby. It is at this point that I remember telling myself the same thing about a month ago. Then I realize that she has been coming to me with requests like these around the same time she's in this condition.


Mrs. C: Oh, don't forget that you have to pay the electricity bill and buy a new mailbox, while you're at it. Plus, could you drop off these entry forms for this newspaper competition for me too?
Me: Why the hell not?


I decide to get started early the next morning on my mission. I leave home at around 8am and soon arrive at a nearby internet café to get the printing and photocopying done. After that I walk across to a nearby supermarket that houses a small post office sub-branch. The atmosphere was fairly grey since the day started so I wasn't too surprised when a light drizzle was falling when I left the internet café.

I got to the corner of the supermarket where the post office had its assigned counter. I get in line but the clerk notices the envelopes in my hand.

Clerk: Do you need stamps?
Me: Yup.
Clerk: Sorry. We're out.

I thank him for not making me waste time in line and head to the taxis. Since I have to head into town anyway to do all the other errands, it isn't any problem to go to the post office there. I get to town and stop to pay the light bill first. This was uneventful as well. The line was long but moved quickly enough.

I move on to the post office for the next leg of my journey. Here, the line was ridiculously long. Not only that, but the clerks didn't seem like they were in a particular hurry either. As the line inched forward, a woman, with child in tow, joined in about two or three people behind me. The child was about two years old and, as soon his mother got tired of holding him and put him down, he started to cry.

Of course he did!

Crying soon became bawling and bawling soon became screaming. All the while, his mom refused to pick him up again. It was clear that everyone in the line was beginning to get irritated, but no one was really willing to say anything. I looked at another (possibly) two-year-old being held by his own mother a few persons in front of me.

"You speak his language. What's up with that?" I thought.

He looked at me and looked the screaming toddler, "Hell if I know," was his facial expression.

Soon the security guard is directed to let them come to the front of the line. They leave soon after that and then people start voicing their complaints about her parenting skills.


Aside from the agonizingly slow pace the rest of this is uneventful. I finish here and drop off the newspaper entries at the next block. I walk across town to get a taxi to drop off Mrs. C's letter.

Me: I need to get to "K" Building. I'm not too sure where it is.
Driver: No problem.

He picks up his other passengers and we're off. Traffic is always heavy in the city on a Friday but eventually we clear it and are leaving the downtown area of Port of Spain. I look at my watch. It's only 10:37am. I'm making better time than I thought. Two of the other passengers drop off along the way, leaving myself, the driver and one other passenger.

Suddenly, the drizzle that had been falling all day turned into a very heavy downpour. The driver put his wipers on high and we could still barely make out the road in front of us.

Driver: Where did you say you were going again?"
Me: "K" Building.
Driver: Shit! We just passed it.

The other passenger is going all the way in and the street was to busy to turn around. He pulls over next to a nearby shopping plaza.

Driver: Sorry about that.
Me: No worries.

I step out under a nearby overhang. He points out "K" Building just down the street and he pulls off. I wait as the rain pours for a few more minutes. Soon, it starts to get lighter but doesn't stop completely. After several more minutes of waiting I get fed up and decide to risk it. "K" Building isn't that far away, after all.

But it was a trap. Once I'm halfway between the safety of my shop-front and "K" Building, the downpour starts up again. I break into a sprint but have to come to a stop at the street separating me from my goal. Once the traffic clears I cross and go inside the building.

By this time, I'm thoroughly soaked. I find the office inside "K" Building, drop off my wife's letter and go back to the exit. The rain is still falling, but, lo and behold, it's lightened up again. I have to cross to get a taxi back and I decide to risk it. AGAIN!!!

I believe my reasoning at this point was that I was already soaked so what's the worst that could happen? Right? It didn't take me long to find out. No sooner do I step out onto the sidewalk in front of the building and prepare to cross the street...

The rest of my trip goes without incident. I get the mailbox and, eventually, I get a taxi to take me home. My phone rings.

Mrs. C: Hey. Just checking in to see how things are going.
Me: Never. Again.


  1. Poop1

    I melt in the rain. Because I'm a witch.

    I never let it touch me.

    Hope you've dried off by now.

  2. I'm glad you got everything done, what with Mrs. C feeling stabby and all. She is one smart lady and clearly, she has been advising other women such as the lady with the two year old who managed to get to the front of that really long line at the post office.

    Mrs. C strikes again!

  3. @ AVB: Agreed. While I prefer a rainy day to a sunny one, I'd rather it be from the safety of indoors.

    @ Nari: Eep! You might be right. Her influence may be more widespread than I initially thought.

  4. Just use this incident as leverage.

  5. *whispers* Calendar!

    Umbrella and a wetsuit?

  6. @ dbs: Oh, I so totally plan to,

    @ AC: Plus, we have frequent flooding in some areas so an inflatable raft may come in handy.

  7. hmmmm. perhaps the gods are punishing you for something?

    what did you do, vinny? WHAT DID YOU DO????

  8. @ Kage: You think it has anything to do with me violating my solemn oath to surf the internet all day & not go outside to do any busy work?

  9. Oh Mrs. C's plan to get things done during Midol time is brilliant. Bloody brilliant. Hope she won't mind I now adopt the Mrs. C plan.

  10. @ Nubian: Mind? She'll be proud that it was even named after her.

  11. I second the wet suit suggestion - practical and fashionable.

    (Kinda fashionable, right?)

  12. "Never. Again." HAHA! Perfect response to that kind of day :-)

  13. hahaha...Just so you know..It's all planned..She walked in and out of that same building 4 times that month, but just for the delight of seeing you squirm and walk around in the rain (yes..planned also) she deliberately didn't drop off the papers. You should find her secret "ways to torture Vinny when feeling stabby that won't land me in jail" box lying around somewhere. Don't let any woman tell you we don't hang on to some stuff just so we can blame it on PMS..


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