Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Conversations With Mrs. C - Aw, Hell No!

The other day, my wife called me at work. She had left early that day to run some errands with Evie (Formerly known as: the old woman).

Me: Hey, what's up?
Mrs. C: I'm in the supermarket now. (Pauses) You know someone tried to grab my phone?
Me: Again?!

While I may be the tech-junkie in our relationship, my wife refuses to settle for anything less than a smart phone. Admittedly, she hasn't had the best luck with phones over the years. She constantly loses, drops and sits/sleeps on them. She also has a habit of leaving them in random places. One time, I had to run back half a block to retrieve it from the table of a pizza place she forgot it on after we had just left. I was actually surprised to see it was still there. Her favorite Motorola “Ming” was the victim of a snatch-and-grab by a petty thief one rainy afternoon a few years ago.
She REALLY loved this phone.

What angers her the most is having to use an old “Me Too” phone I keep lying around in-between replacements. Which she ends up having to use often.

Needless to say, she has gone through a few.

Mrs. C: Yeah, but they didn't get it this time. I was on a call and I saw his shadow as he came up from behind. As he grabbed it, I wrestled my hand away.
Me: What happened then.
Mrs. C: He ran away. He was just some stupid little boy.
Me: You're lucky.
Mrs. C: He's the lucky one. He's lucky I was wearing heels or I would have chased him down and kicked his ass.
Me: Whoa! Easy now!
Mrs. C: No, Vinny! I'm totally fed up of these guys.

Now you see where I got the idea for Diane from.

She dons her costume again.


  1. I like her, she is feisty! I always say the same thing, if someone tries to steal something or hurt me, they better well knock me out because if I get up, they are in big trouble!

  2. Yikes, damn phone thievery! I say high heels were invented to use as a weapon so your wife has the right idea!

    I can't talk about smart phones since I use a distinctly non smart Razr from about six years ago, purely because I refuse to admit any need to use the web or apps when out of the house. I mean I'm tied to the computer as it is for crying out loud. :)

  3. I had a ming.. i loved that phone!! but my ex needed money so he sold it and then gave me a crappy phone.. Nice huh?! lol.

    i love my smart phone.. I couldn't live with out it! :-)

  4. Mrs. C is awesome! Those petty phone thieves better watch out...and they better check her feet before they try something like that again.

  5. @ Random Girl:I think you two pretty much share the same philosophy.

    @ Vegetable Assassin: Considering how much she spends on her shoes, I doubt she was willing to toss 'em.

    @ Nubian: So I keep telling her.

    @ Overthinking Mama: Trust me, the only she didn't chase the other guy who stole the Ming (in her heels) was because it was raining so hard that day.

    @ AC: There are some disadvantages. Not much, but they're there.

    @ Nari: They're lucky she hates flats.

  6. Dear god, what kind of phone is that!!! I want it! I want it bad! I would punch Obama in the balls for that phone!

  7. This is freakin awesome. Go Misses C!

  8. diane/mrs c. is so badass. but how much you wanna bet she almost left her phone behind again but remembered at the last second and concocted this dramatic tale to tell you about her scare.

    i'd bank on it.

  9. Why would people steal phones? I don't get it. (I don't have a phone.) But I totally want to watch Mrs. C kick some kid's ass. Or at least a cartoon version named Diane do it. Hint. Hint.

  10. What's the thing in the middle of the phone?

    It looks like a blue vagina.

    Are you people Smurfs?

  11. @ THUNDERCAT: That particular model came out about 5 years ago. Even now I still think it's pretty cool.

    @ paulsifer: She may hate flats but from time to time she wears sneakers. I hope they have the sense never to try then.

    pattypunker: Hmmm... Sneaky move. I think I'll have to investigate.

    dbs: I like where you're going. I'm on it.

    Moooooog: What the smurf! How the smurf did I miss that? I thought I smurfing deleted all those smurfing pics. Smurf me!

  12. LOL! Love it! Reminds me of when my sister chased some guy down the street and kicked his ass for wacking her on the bottom as he went
    She's not a violent person but had had a really bad day and this was the final straw. She

    I'm always telling my Hubby I'm going to kick someones ass. But I never do.


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