Sometimes, when my wife is at work, she need to reach out to me to help her get through the monotony of the day. For this she'll send me a quick email from her work station, between customers. As any good husband will, I do my best to help her get through her day. Take this email conversation we had last week as an example:
Mrs. C: How is my huzzie doin’?
Me: Just settling down to study. And you, wife of mine?
Mrs. C: Well I'm fine now that you asked. Thank you for your support, hon. (I gave her some advice on something that morning. I can't remember what.)
Me: You mean how I held your boobs for you this morning? Any time! ;) (I also did that that morning too. Come to think of it, I do that almost every morning.)
Mrs. C: Hey!!! Keep it PG rated. On my work computer remember. Lol! (As I said, she works in a bank. Their systems passively monitor EVERYTHING that goes on on staff computers.)
Me: I know. Just giving them something interesting to read.
Mrs. C: Uhmm....
Me: So, you got in on time? (Note how I skillfully change the subject.)
Mrs. C: Yeah, yeah. No probs there.
A few minutes pass...
Mrs. C: I think this bra is too tight. My chest is hurting. At least, I hope that's the cause. Sigh!
Me: I thought we weren't going to talk about your boobs here. (In my defense, she was the one who took it back there.)
Mrs. C: I didn't I said bra, talk about a one track mind, uhmmm....
Me: Well, excuse me. Is it your bra that's hurting, or what's inside? I rest my case.
Mrs. C: I said my "chest" one track mind much?
Me: Same difference.
Mrs. C: No, big diff! It's not what's in my bra that's hurting it's my actual chest. The center. Perv!
So then we're talking about your cleavage then? Is that allowed?
Mrs. C: You’re hopeless! *throw hands up in d air in surrender*
Me: Better recognize!
Needless to say, she isn't overly concerned with her boring workday anymore. I guess she's too busy worrying about one day being called into a meeting over her using the company email for her inappropriate conversations.