Early morning hours: I'm awakened by my wife just coming to bed.
Me: Hey, you. What time is it?
Mrs. C: About half three.
I suppose I should shed some light here. My wife doesn't work a regular daytime job. She works from afternoon into late evenings doing end-of-day data processing. On top of that she developed insomnia about two years ago - partially thanks to the job hours - which comes and goes. It's become common for her to finally turn in at these kinds of hours.
As usual, we quickly discuss the plan for the day ahead and settle in. After a few seconds of silence:
Mrs. C: I think we should stop using toothpaste.
Mrs. C: Fluoride is unhealthy. You know it's actually a poison?
Me: Who have you been talking to?
Mrs. C: Nobody. We should probably try to get spring water too. For drinking. Don't they put it in the water too?
Me: I don't think they don't do that in Trinidad.
Mrs. C: Oh. Well chlorine isn't good either. Anyhow, you can make your own toothpaste from coconut oil and salt and...
Me: I'm guessing we can kiss minty fresh breaths goodbye, then?
Mrs. C: I'm serious! You remember when you talked about moving to the country and starting a farm? I think we should do that. It's much cleaner out there.
Me: (Pretending to be asleep)
Mrs. C: We could raise or own livestock. All the meat we get now is filled with chemicals.
Me: Do you know how to slaughter a cow?
Mrs. C: Well I was more thinking chickens. (She didn't wait for me to ask if she knew how to slaughter chickens) Besides, country people are friendly. One of our neighbors could do it for us.
Me: You've been up surfing the net all night, haven't you.
Mrs. C: I!... A little...
Me: Okay, I think you need supervision, or something, whenever you go on the net. You always end up freaking yourself out. The web's not controlled. Anybody can say anything there and you can't believe it all.
Mrs. C: I know that, but...
Me: Time to sleep now.
Mrs. C: 'K.
A few more seconds pass.
Me: You know I'm totally gonna blog this, right?
Mrs. C: (Pretending to be asleep)